The Update-a-Day Experiment

I’m going to attempt an update-a-day for the next month.

I’ve noticed that my updates so far have been somewhat haphazard, which is a problem. According to the literature, only regular updates can turn people into internet zombies willing to do my bidding. Due to the update irregularity, the construction of my online army of undead warriors has stalled.

If doing a website like this for a couple of years has taught me anything (and all signs indicate that it hasn’t), the lesson is this: generating your own zombie army is not as easy as some make it out to be.

Sure, you can read books like Creating an Undead Zombie Army for Dummies or The Idiot’s Guide to Zombie Army Construction (for fun and profit), but the advice given there is somewhat flippant and definitely not worth taking at face value. (One “zombie expert” even devotes a chapter musing that the exploits of Frankenstein are “possibly real”. Of course Frankenstein’s monster is real—there’s a book about it.)

So I’m going to try an update-a-day for a while to see how things go.

Inter-lewd:

Just in case anyone wants to know what I look like, rather than waiting for you to ask, I’ve been told I look a little like a cross between Pup Clark and Roy Symonds...no wait, that was only in a dream I had where the three of us were involved in a three-way gay wedding. Forget I said it.

In reality I look more like Megan Gale...if she were a boy...and if she were attractive.

I’m not exactly sure what this additional pressure will do, but I do know it will cause two of the following three things to happen:

  • I will go completely pterodactyl and bust an aneurysm, turning my otherwise thoughtful views insane and weird, so weird that I will no longer have a menu category called ‘Weird’.
  • The quality will drop. Some more mathematically-minded readers might scoff at this and produce proofs as to how it is impossible for the quality to drop any further, but I assure you it could.
  • Both of the above.

Let’s see how we go.